Damages

I used to cry about the heart-break
I once felt. 
Content with anger this just 
Turned into a ship wreck. 
An iceberg ripped this hole into the side Panels.
I mean it shattered at the starboard.
From different angles. 
Flooded out the interior.
And, drug my depth to despair. 
It was death in a sense.
A soul lost,
Senseless 
And unforeseen. 

I’m there again. 
The future looks grim. 
I fell hard for another.
Yea, gaslighted again
I mean gassed out, you see the smokescreen. 
Can’t see, eat, rest or even think straight. 
I’m hit by it.
I’m like a burned tire. 
Thrown high
Like a roadside casualty, 
It’s just Another body. 

I get the irony.
Yet It’s kinda strange. 
And here I am always 
sitting on my thought shit.
I don’t mean thot. 
I mean I’m choking on my thoughts,
Shit.

What the fuck is up. Do I deserve this? 
I mean I’ve given it my all, 
I don’t deserve this. 
It’s so absurd to think 
I finally met the one. 
And here again. 
I might be sitting here the lonely boy. 
With a hole in my chest.
A hallow cavity. 
Empty vessel a fuckin calamity. 
Allergic to damages beat up 
bruised.

The parts used 
And I’m fuckin confused by all of it.
But what can I do? 
When I’m far too clueless 
To make use of the Damages.